What we think, how we feel and the way we act in the world are all influenced by our relationship with a sense of belonging, safety, love, freedom and control, amongst others.
The story that we tell ourselves (and others) about who we are, sometimes keeps us stuck in familiar but painful patterns. In counselling we can work together to identify these patterns and gently release their grip.
The counselling space offers opportunities to explore, understand and change how you experience the things that are currently troubling you. Counselling isn't about advising or telling you what to do. It's my belief that counselling can put you back in touch with your own wise self and free you to make the changes you choose.
In couples counselling, I offer a safe, non-judgmental space where we can openly discuss the difficulties you are experiencing, and explore ways of resolving them.
I have worked with many couples experiencing difficulties in their relationship. The kinds of issues that often arise are communication problems, the aftermath of an affair, separation and divorce, intimacy/sexual difficulties (sometimes psychosexual therapy may be more appropriate; for more details see below), adjusting to a new relationship (and the complexities of step-parenting) and facing, surviving and strengthening relationships tested by life events (bereavement, children leaving home, redundancy, retirement, birth of a child).
Many couples tell me they wish they hadn’t waited so long to seek relationship counselling; the earlier you recognise there’s a problem and begin to deal with it, the better the outcome for you and your relationship.
In psychosexual therapy, (also known as ‘sex therapy’/PST), I work with individuals and couples experiencing sexual problems, using a cognitive behavioural theoretical (CBT) framework. The types of sexual problems treated in PST include: lack of sexual desire, difficulties with penetration (vaginismus), pain on intercourse (dyspareunia), erectile dysfunction, premature ejaculation, and difficulties with orgasm.
Once we have decided that PST is the right treatment for your difficulty, I devise an individualised treatment programme. Treatment programmes include individual, self-focus tasks and graded touching tasks (also known as 'sensate focus') for couples. PST is a talking therapy only and all tasks are to be carried out in the privacy of your own home.
Sex therapy has a good success rate and being able to discuss your difficulty in an open, non-judgmental atmosphere, coupled with specific homework tasks, enables you to (re)discover a happy, fulfilling sex life.
Please note that I only accept professional referrals for psychosexual therapy.